fuck yea just found my unicorn costume from when i was 8... still fits
Are you still giving blowjobs?
Who is this?
I gather from Facebook you got drunk last night and took semi naked pictures of yourself?
You were definitely drunk. You gave him an otphj in front of everyone.
He didn't call me beautiful but he came in less than five minutes so same thing, right?
I know. In fairness he did tell me to throw up out his window onto his roof so I don't think he's pissed at me but I'm still mortified by the whole situation.
valentines day is a day for loved ones to share. So me and my vibrator. Happy holidays.
I will read books by day and do guys by night. A mental and physical enlightenment, if you will.
You can trust me. I'm unemployed and not wearing pants.
I've been continuously high for the last 48 hours, and just broke my 4th vibrator. Coincidence? FIND ME A MAN I BEG OF YOU.
Is there a hallmark card for "could you please slide the FUCK out of my DMs"....?
You yell at me for being attracted to older guys and you're over here condoning murder
Dude, exfoliate your balls. you'll thank me later.
I remember that. We went to taco bell looking for pizza.
I just saw a guy faceplant off a unicycle while holding a saxophone, while his buddy riding another unicycle and sporting a flute rode by laughing
Only at UConn...
Randomize