you kept running across the street. everytime you made it across successfully you took something off. can't believe there were no cops around...
oh thats it?
So this girl in my math class just went to the bathroom, tampon in hand, comes back with it still in her hand starts digging around in her purse, takes her thing of birthcontrol out, goes oh fuck, and downs the rest of the pills. Got to love college.
I Just realized that having a picture folder that says "not for mom" may give off the wrong impression to wondering eyes
At the T-Rex bar with my nephew...only in Disney can I have a beer and a soda at the bar with a 4 year old
There's an australian, my relationship has no hope.
All I got from that conversation with the officer was "blah blah blah, you're disgusting, blah blah blah, $500 fine, blah blah blah, be in court Tuesday."
Had the longest conversation today with a potentially homeless cuban woman about mind control.
No if my life depended on you fingering me just let me die
Is "I am going to murder you if you keep sending me requests that I cannot fulfill" unprofesh?
Just remember that no one else gets to suck his dick but you, feel honored. It's like the Olympic torch of life is being passed off to you and it's your time to run
No he reached for my hand at the beach. I pretended to be a seagull.
This feels more like a conference of all the people I've fucked in the past year.
Bro.. I am absolutely going to have sex with our old middle school health teacher
He told me that after two hours of fucking he feels as though his dick wants to detach from his body and go to Mexico..
Like either my tits got bigger or I've succumbed to Trumps tiny hand syndrome
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