i hope you realize when i said "grib" earlier i was referring to the gridded binary, a mathematically concise data format commonly used in meteorology to store historical weather forecast data. also meant in referential conjunction to my probability math class that i am failing at roughly 215pm tomorrow afternoon.
Friends don't let friends fuck ugly girls. WALK AWAY FROM HER!
I just heard an old guy ask the chick he was with if she wanted to try ass to mouth...
thanks for that.
she said, and i quote, "i want to black out with my rack out"
She was raised with a wonderful home life. I can't do anything with that.
It's one thing to send dick shots. It's a whole other thing to send unimpressive dick shots while wearing crocs.
Go to petsmart and tell me if the dog trainer is the guy I slept with friday. Thanks.
Its funny how you denied every part of the text except " you hate fat ppl"
He insists on falling asleep with his penis between my buttcheeks. He says its his "home".
I'm so high. Midnight pancake breakfast in bed
Got a high five from a Superman stripper tonight
Don't take advice from me. I'm simultaneously shitting and eating cheesecake.
I ate so much cake that I can't even enjoy a blowjob
That's the most first world problem I've ever heard in my life.
maybe i should limp back to therapy...
oh yeah will you also bring home vodka i wanna do shots on the roof
i saved a drunk oompa loompa he was passed out on the lawn and i picked him up figured out where he lived and put him in his bed and wrote his roommate a note
Randomize
