I'll bet she douches with gravy.
could you grab mr moo while you're at his apt?
you brought your stuffed animal to a booty call?
Getting 10 cents back for every can is really just encouraging alcoholism.
You stood in front of a yellow Camaro and kept yelling at it to "Transform already!!!!".. yeah, I'd say you were pretty wasted.
I will not ride trays down a flight of stairs topless and drunk....
The fact that its 530pm and I'm saying to myself I should sober up since I'm at a family establishment should say enough
I'm stuck on the dance floor between two fat people. I don't think they feel my existence. Please help.
I need you to help me convince Steph that she will like Tequila if she would chase it with A-1
She's cute. And her snoring noises remind me of the incidental music from Jaws.
he fucked me with his goalie mask on. it was like sleeping with Darth Vader
OUR DIABOLICAL SLUT PLAN HATH COMMENCED!
I've entered the world of uncircumcised penises. It's disgusting.
Called my house today and my 10 year old brother answered and asked if I was still in jail
One time she showed me her pierced nipples in our high school locker room and now she has a daughter
We are back but we are listening to stairway to heaven in my car. Amy is air drums. Be back when it's over.
Randomize
