"Not only do I bring a guy back to my hotel room....But I bring one back for my friend who's passed out drunk. Now that's what we call BESTfriends"
Ate lunch. Still drunk. Keep forgetting I'm in Texas but then I look around at the people and remember.
Have you ever wondered what your stripper song would be?
he got a charlie horse midthrust which triggered my orgasm we're still sorting this out.
Bathrooms are cool, I think Im just gonna hang out here for a bit.
Tis the season to puke in grandma's bathroom
I love it. Like, more than my penis at the moment.
i sucked his cock and got snuggles in return. I'm the mother Theresa of giving in a relationship.
In this town being related to a brewing family or the owner of a sports team is like being royalty. It's like hooking up with the queen's nephew or something.
I'm praying that the company stray cat shows up tomorrow. I think I may have hit it while leaving Friday. Nobody will believe it was an accident after I hit the last one.
He got me a cake that said " Congratulations on the dick "
My passport was stamped in Canada two weeks ago. One step closer to uncovering wtf happened that night
Sorry, that was mean and I didn't mean it. I'm just mad at condoms
I've faked every orgasm I've ever had, I think I can fake being sick for 8 hours.
I'd kiss your neck and collarbone and then run my tongue up your neck to just behind your ear
And then lightly kick the curve inside your ear
Randomize
