Don't use my boy Weezy to support your whoreish tendencies.
dude i just saw a topless girl trying to get into her locked car. im moving here
Do fat girls normaly have fat that look like a penis by their pussy?
What the hell did you do last night?!
All I remember is saying that "fire will make it all better"
Dude, the cops never think it's as funny as you do.
at this point every shot is just a haymaker to my liver
I think I'm coming down now. I almost started crying because I lost a piece of paper.
I'm going to a foam party and gonna grind someones dick off hayy
He wanted to drink hypnotic from my butt crack. I need to move out this state.
Just got a ride from a stranger while walking a mile home as it hailed with no coat. He asked me if I smoked, then said he just made some potent cookies and I could have one.
The cookie was what I originally wanted to tell you. Always say yes to drugs from strangers
Plus my fingers were hella swollen from eating all these cured meats so it was like I was given it to her with Hulk Hands on
I'm pretty sure the guy who was grinding on me while I was trying to get a drink at he bar was one of my tinder matches
dude, she has my telletubby sweats and my good sweatshirt hostage, I can't risk their safety with a breakup
That's just how I roll. I drink, then tell people I'm either not wearing underwear or I'm training to be a stripper.
I will not go because I am a man of my word and of my penis.
Randomize
