the igloo is complete. bring your weed and the hat with the floppy ears
Just sucked my third dick in the past twelve hours. I must want AIDS.
I'd be there a lot sooner if these damn stairs would stop moving.
I think my hopes are too high for this one. The only other bachelorette party I've been to I was felt up by a Chippendale's dancer and smoked a joint with the party bus driver.
Go forth Daniel, drink, be merry... And meet some hot Asians for your friends to bang
WHY AM I THE ONLY ONE CONCERNED ABOUT THE SEAGULL IN THE OVEN
Kriste-san. Brian-sensai going to sleepy times acturry. Kriste-grasshopper will spend fun-fun times with Brian-sensai and glorious redbox movie tomorrow yes?
Most creative movie date proposition... ever.
Sorry, I was trapped in a small closet behind a washer. What's up?
Well my unnaturally hairy chest finally came in handy. It took at least an hour to shave the american flag into my chest but I definitely went America all over that party
Plus who wants to live somewhere tom jerked off? No one.
After the day I've had, I can't decide if donuts or fireball would be the appropriate priority.
So now I have had sex with 2 people my son graduated high school with.
I woke up with my converse still on and a plate of pasta next to my face, if that gives you any indication of how my night went
Got so high i fell asleep kyaking...for 2 hours.
Do you think it would be weird to wear a shirt that says 'big fun small package' from an ex for a first date?
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