2 v-cards in one night. impossible is nothing.
When you're about to leave, tell him "bye." At that point, he should say something. If he doesn't say anything, well, our drinks were free and he gets a free make out with yours truly.
You know, I really only think drinking is a problem if you're not good at it.
this one can actually spell my name, that's a shoe-in
do you have any idea how expensive it is to have the munchies at Disneyland?
The voicemail says i shouldn't bother ever showing my face there again, i don't understand
We visited your boss last night. guess you wont be paying the rent this month, eh?
He told me all about his plan for proposing to his girlfriend as pillow talk.
Her vagina smelt so bad I lied and told her that I was married just so that she would leave.
someone who i have in my phone as thundercock just said he was DTF
Na Im fine, just need to un-grow this vagina I've developed
No, we got so into acting out our role play characters we didn't even fuck. still sucess.
This was like angel cum on the bread of life filled with the nectar of the gods
a guy just skateboarded past my window in a bunny suit while chased by a dog walker
he's so sweet and its so cute. but I swear to fuck if I let my guard down and this was all a lie I am going to become a serial killer.
you had her IN YOUR BED NO PANTS AND YOU GAVE HER THW BOOT?!?!?!
Stage five clinger bro. had to go.
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