The sex was so not worth the four dollars it cost to drive over the bridge
Lots of explosions. Minor nudity. Full penetration and lots of tuxedos.
One of my students just said I have "big mommy parts". Even third graders know that my tits are too big. God I love em.
So apparently when he was telling people he was in Alaska for 6 months he was actually in jail
Very nice. It looks like a Fisher-Price My First Dildo, but still very nice.
I think my new low is running outside in a towel to pet a particularly fluffy looking squirrel and projectile vomiting off the balcony.
Sorry about sucking tonight. Drunk truck fucking is apparently not my strong point.
My roommate is watching gummy bears "race" from a mega-marshmallow to his lava lamp.
Looking through my moms phone and find a pic if a dick. Scarred for life.
Please write a memoir and name it "Game Boy and Dick Stuff"
No. Nooooo. No way. She looked like Amanda Bynes. The recent one not the one from All That.
NO BABIES. YOUR VAGINA WILL BLEED WITHIN A FORTNIGHT.
Are you opposed to me trying out your penis?
She just. Cock slapped me. With string cheese.
what are you up to?
it's 8pm, i've already showered and gotten in bed. if you wanted to make plans u should have asked 3 months in advance
Randomize
