the whole time he was cumming, he did the joey lawrence WHOA. over and over. WHOA. WHOA. WHOA. WHOA.
a queef is a wish your heart makes.
At least a dozen asian tourists will be showing their friends pictures of me peeing off of Hoover Dam with a cop pointing his gun at me when they get home. I worry about the impact on their children.
Don't forget your talking to the guy who got arrested for throwing beads back at the Mardi Gras floats. You can't deny that's a first, and neither could that cop.
Well, of course, to the untrained eye I look like a slut.
You ordered 6 boxes of pizza and laughed in the pizza guys face when you didn't pay for any of them.
You know me. Don't need roses, just dick and food.
She was moaning so loud as i walked out of the room her roommates gave me a standing ovation... i think they are next
Tommarow we shall sacrifice the freshmen to the sun god
That UFC fighter fucked me so hard I have what can only be described as a "cuntcussion"
Hey, I told her the bathroom was a "No fly zone" after I used it. She willingly allowed her nose to go through that pain. It's her fault, she only supplied me with vodka when she knows I only drink rum.
I'm going to fake an anxiety attack to get to the front of the line. Save me some brisket.
stoners and superglue do NOT mix
Pssh I just bang a girl in a single person tent. Thats like the back seat of a sedan.
your marriage is hazardous to my nightlife
yea, mine too.
Randomize