if i'm ever as drunk as the girl in front of me... kill me.
im having a hard time not telling ppl about ur bathroom story
woke up naked, gf gone. There is a cup of change in the fridge, a bird in the bathroom, and odie is drawn on my ceiling. I live in a non sequitur
there really is only one way to give a PowerPoint presentation in your senior capstone class: still drunk.
Whoever put the tambourine in the dryer is a douche. Worst hangover wakeup ever
When I look at old family photos I know how jessica simpson feels when she watches dukes of hazzard
Tequila bombs in champagne seemed like a good idea at the time.
No...this little piggys going to the bar
Just streaked campus for a bottle of patron...maybe you're right...I might have a drinking problem...
You went into the shower with my roommate and cursed him out asking why he was there
I went shopping for a dress that was baptism and bar appropriate.
I had sex with him and I blame the Doritos
Happy hour crawl turned into power happy hour turned into tequila shots turned into I'm drunk in class on Cinco de Mayo at 7 am.
i'm drinking soco out of a mickey mouse cup right now. i love it when college and my childhood meet in the middle.
We woke up today with 24 donuts, a tie, two jugs of vodka that we traded an extra sandwich for, and a british boy
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