I don't wanna hook up with anyone from minnesota
everybody there reminds me of mashed potatoes... white and lumpy
They just gave us root beer floats. I guess I won't quit my job today.
I guess we had a small kitchen fire somehow when we decided to bake fruitroll ups and croutons...
You held your own hair and threw up into a red cup...I think they were more amazed than upset.
Jeff just maced a waitress...it's way too early for this.
I just walked by a party bus on my way to study. God hates me.
I hope no one at work will be able to read the "who wants body shots" on my chest. I forgot about it.
you cant just puke in an arbys and not order food. thatd be rude.
I'll be honest with you, my dick was out at that point in time.
You would be too ashamed to ever love me again if you saw the filth I just created. It brings unspeakable dishonor to the nacho dynasty. Like I raped the king's daughter, cut off her hands and made him eat them that's how hard I fucked up nachos.
He told me that his favorite part about me is hearing my voice while we fuck. I think that was the nicest thing he has EVER said to me.
Hey remember that time you called a woman a "man in a dress" and then threw up in a drinking fountain?
I got your flops too. But yeah you rolled off your raft a bunch of times so we had to ask the white trash squad to help you back on. You bit one of them
Idk I wanna make it till midnight but I also want tequila
It was some weird herd predator-evasion instinct. All 15 of us took off running in different directions, and the two cops just stood there, perplexed. They had no idea who to chase.
Randomize
