In a few years, 50 babies 50 states. Like it?
His second form of ID was an emergency room wristband from an hour ago. What the fuck is going on right now
Haha yeah he had an allergic reaction to the alcohol earlier. He thinks that if he only drinks vodka he will be ok...
I don't really want to write this paper. It's the last one of the semester - I need to savor the feeling of procrastination.
I just blindly shoved it in. I'm still not sure which hole I got.
I don't have enough holes for all these australians
I think I might stay on campus instead of going home for thanksgiving and see how many townies I can hook up with and no one will be around to judge
thanks for carrying me to bed.. and sorry for trying to roll down the hallway to escape.
I'm getting to the point of going up to a guy and saying "Hi I'm maggie and i can put my foot behind my head"... That desperate.
I'll be really easy to find... I'm the naked one rolling around in cats.
We went from zero to drunk tank in 45 minutes.
I just gate-crahed a party and met a state senator, so I had an interesting afternoon jog.
The Vicodin is in the strawberries.
My intervention, when it happens, should have vanilla cake....buttermilk icing.
I haven't showered. And am sitting in the office smelling like a beer can someone's been using as an ash tray.
They offered me pot brownies in 7 minutes flat. Imagine my horror when I had to be like, are those gluten free?
Randomize
