He is like the real live version of the state fair..
You asked him to stand still, you put your leg on his shoulder, started dry humping the air
It was odd. His friends dick tasted the same as his. Friends are beginning to have to much in common
there were like 150 questions AFTER the application. you'd think for a store that has dick molding kits it'd be a joke
Give me one reason I shouldn't put the phrase "sex emotions" into my essay.
No.
The uberlube is also flammable
I learned a very valuable lesson tonight...don't touch a cops tazer
I feel like my dick pic collection should be archived at the Smithsonian
Also I'd apologize for texting you flipping my shit about the science of hair growth while I was shrooming last night but we know each other better than that
It was fine. Until I accidentally shit on his floor.
in the middle of telling this chick to sober up i was shotgunning beers. im gonna be ab awsome nurse.
I just talked to him. no worries he had the same fears you did this morning and smelled the dryer to make sure. you officially did not pee in there haha
FUCK WHALES
One of my nipples looks nothing like the other...i don't know how this happened
drunk boyfriend and drunk me are NOT meant for each other
Randomize
