Moral of the story: don't get pregs or your chances in the beer league are over
I bruised my spine.. Jungle gyms were clearly not meant for sex.
Why do i even want him? It's like his dick is a trophy and I need to put it on my wall of shame.
It looks like a tornado ripped through our living room and scattered clothes everywhere.
Count the bras. It was a category 3 whorenado ... I convinced the lesbians to come back to the apartment for a bottle of wine.
happy find a boyfriend by next Valentines Day. Its like a new years resolution but depressing
I think he's having people over to watch him get way too drunk again
His wife made me pancakes and let me borrow a clean shirt. Should I drop his class or use this to my advantage
Heres a quick tip! When getting black out head from your girlfriend dont come to and say "wait... wheres my girlfriend"
Is he the circus guy or the bi-curious street preacher?
They sleep with other people as long as there is no oral. Logic and reason were thrown out the window a long time ago with them.
I just busted my piggy bank to afford McDonald's. This is my personal cry for help.
Using the money underagers give me to buy this semesters books.. My mom would be so proud
Every time I start to trust vodka, it does this to me.
I just wish the first erections of my life didn't take place at a dentists office but hey whatever I turned out alright
Upon further investigation my nipples are bruised and I have teeth marks all over.
Randomize