Stuck in the Dallas airport. At the bar. Everytime a flight to DC gets cancelled, I'm takin a shot. Fuck you snow.
just got a girls number while on a 5 am adderall cig break this is college at its finest
You kept excitedly announcing to the bar what time it was. Followed by an equally excited "Clock language still makes sense!"
we took shots then she made me eat a dill pickle with cream cheese wrapped in a piece of turkey.
Drinking with a woman who gave an anti-drugs speech at my high school. Somehow, not surprised.
If I come back covered in mud topless and banging on your door, please have a warm towel ready for me
The gym has a pool
my gym membership just went from "way to get in shape" to "place to go swim when I'm high"
Nothing sez sunday morning like waking up in a phonebooth with a leg cramp.
This morning two of his housemate threw confetti over me, started singing and handed me a make shift trophy out of cereal boxes and beer cans that said 'Harry's Virginity' on it. Fucking brilliant!
She wanted to roleplay. Apparently you be snow and i'll be a plow wasn't an option
That bitch makes my crazy look like a walk in the park with cotton candy
Masturbated before I came into work and now the finger scanner won't clock me in. Fuck Valentines Day.
Just made a memo in my blackberry that contains seth's funeral arrangements. I have a feeling he has big plans for the weekend.
It is such a beautiful day to not be arrested
Just got a handjob in my psych lecture. You were right, going to class is paying off.
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