Dude I just witnessed a midget touching himself and singing the chorus to somebodys watching me by michael jackson... it kinda turned me on
What are you talking about? And how drunk are you?
Both
wait so...it's like an actual thing to masturbate using the detachable shower head? WTF I thought I was being creative!
dont get mad but guess who just got banned for life from dodger stadium
So I just learned that my father was teaching me rules for drinking games when I was 5.
I cant tell which is worse. That its only my third time doing laundry this year or that its the first time ive done it sober.
how bad is she
captain morgan with tits
You have a roommate and cry when you see my dick
So question, would you consider it morally wrong to grind up Cialas and put it in ones cocktail? Then I get what I want and he doesn't have to be embarrassed and he can win the mental game with himself? I'm only thinking of him...
Doesn't matter how many times we tell him the kid's a freshman, he keeps repeating "cupcake boy shall be mine" and honestly you need to intervene
Dude. You dropped to your knees and face planted into the rocks. And continued to talk on the phone and laugh. That's where those cuts came from.
That's it. I'm moving to LA & sitting on his face.
He was a Cher impersonator. They are the draggest of queens
Mom got drunk as hell, crashed Dad's wedding and some how left with the best man. This is why you should be glad you aren't my sibling.
Drunk me bought a cell phone last week and began texting sober me. The conversation between the two is still on going.
Randomize
