At a strip club after monster truck rally. You should be here
you only had a canadian ten, but you said it was all good cuz you would just by molson.
What type of outfit says "I know you slept with my boyfriend before and are also way skinnier than me, but I look better...somehow"
You're going to have to buy me a lot of drinks before the bee suit goes on...
Atty had lunch with DA and confirmed I am not the target of the investigation. No word on anything else
I think I slept in the cheesecake last night. Either that or I had a wet dream. Whatever happened I need to wash my pants.
It's ok for me to have his baby but I can't be his friend on fb. Wth is wrong with this
On a scale of one to america, how free are you this weekend?
Attention ladies coming to the party tonight! Tonight will be another chance to win the 5 bucks for getting my cousin hard. Bring your a-game, no one has been able to overcome the whiskey dick yet. Good luck.
The penis is a tricky weapon to use. When using it as leverage you have to make it seem emotional. I'd rather use it as a club sometimes.
He told me if he passed out to wake him by sitting on his face, and if he suffocated at least he would die happy. Found the one.
You ever feel like just rubbing your face in everything like a dog?
Don't make me do math I'm drunk and full of chicken
He can't say no, it's my spiritual goddamn quest.
Worst wingman u don't do ANYTHING but laugh at my incompitant shyness
Randomize
