I told him next time he kisses her to remember where that mouth has been...
How'd that go?
Hes on his way with a baseball bat...
dude i just saw a drunk guy attempt to get by IUPD and throw a uprooted bleacher seat over the edge of the stadium. funniest thing of life.
details please.
they caught him 10 rows from the top. the first thing he said was "wait I can explain, i just have to throw this over first."
one of the cashiers from Kroger is eating at my kitchen table and nobody knows why.
Gave a homeless guy 3 bucks earlier. Just saw him at the bar. He bought one beer and left. Happy to see my 3 dollars was well spent
Between the plague n the counterfeit drugs we brought back from mexico I'm not thinking too highly of their country right now. Screw mexican homeless men.
That's the girl I met who was peeing on the driveway with me. We bonded
you have a wonderful penis attached to someone I'm having a lot of problems with right now
Porn. Physics. Porn. Icecream. Porn. That's my life now.
she just called me the flavor packet to her ramen noodles. get me the fuck out of here.
I'm drunk, we're losing, and I'm in the visitors stands. This is about to get ugly.
I just fist bumped God in my head for last night. What a bro.
We set around a table in a hotel room and he spoon fed Molly to everyone there... I felt sketch for sec but then... Oh well.
There is a midget in cheetah face paint on a leash here
I AHVE A WINE BUCKETTTTTTT
Walking back to my car from the campus library and just saw a Nuva Ring on the sidewalk. If that doesn't scream college life, idk what does.
Randomize
