If you text me again I will gut all of your stuffed animals.
it was the least impressive dick i've ever seen... and i've changed babies' diapers.
so she asking me "is it okay to have dangling labias?"
John tries to set me up, and she has 1 arm. I'm a nice guy, but 2 arms is kinda a requirement
just put cider in my bong. gotta love fall
Every single piece. I examined every single square inch of this peanut butter and jelly sandwich. and fell in love with every inch. that high.
Dude. She told me she felt bad for not giving me more blojobs. HOW COULD THAT HAVE GONE BETTER?
he said he wants to do me james and the giant peach style. im afraid of what that means. but moderately excited. wish me luck.
TAing a class of 300 froshies and being so hungover I forgot a bra is my way of making dreams come true.
One thing noone tells you about getting put in the drunk tank is do it barefoot. You get free flipflops.
Life for us students isn't all fun and drunken lesbian affairs you know
I've never seen an uncircumcised dick in real life and the internet indicates I don't want to.
It's shark week go big or go home
She calls him the walking dildo to his face. That relationship is already fucked up.
He fucks strippers and doesn’t have a life plan. Of course I’m going to regret this
Randomize