i'd rather walk the sahara in a snuggie with no water than take a bicycle cab
meow
WTF. STOP SENDING ME ANIMAL NOISES. ITS FUCKING WEIRD.
her fupa was seducing me. this is the last time i'm doing shrooms.
His dick was so small it sat perched on top of his balls like it was king of his scrotum.
remind me not to puke in the mesh trash can tonight
she's walking down the hall in a thong and one flip flop and one ugg
I hope you remember pushing the girl off the stage because you said she wasn't good at pole dancing.
I think you can do her, she seemed pretty set for revenge the second time her boyfrind high fives her in the face.
There are fucking limits. Jerking another guy off in the bar toes the line.
I got home and laid by the toilet and then alexa laid in the bathtub and sang the preamble while kayla held my hair
Don't. You get on the 18 year old. I'll get on the 38 year old. Together we will bridge 2 decades of cock.
bro, your right, i shouldn't feel embarrassed about taking shots from a penis-shaped ice sculpture
"If it gets you high just do it" I told him he was the Nike of drug abuse
Thanks for takin my cousin out last night, sorry I passed out so early
You kidding, the kids a legend. He literally killed a bottle of Jamison, made out with a girl AND her Mom at the bar, stole us slices of pizza and told the cab driver where to go in Spanish. He doesn't even live in the area. Can we keep him?
I'm currently trying to figure out a way to fill the bathtub up with mashed potatoes so when he comes over he'll know what's about to hit him..
Randomize
