So the bouncer told me I could leave the easy way or the hard way. I told him I was going to make him earn his 10 bucks that hour.
Apparently you chose the latter.
I was wrong being drunk doesn't make accounting more interesting
your youtube search consisted of "food slideshow" and "the angry beavers"
she made me put on a condom before giving me a handjob...this is why i hate freshmen
They refer to his house as "the abortion clinic". Cant wait.
She's good at three things and two of them involve dicks. And other one involves her love for arts
I've just never had a dinner guest strut in, go directly to my bathroom, vomit.. then come out demanding whiskey and food.
I am definitely the only sober one on this train. And the only one not wearing a business suit. Wow, Monday Korea.
I'll keep you from getting pregnant and you keep my papers gramaticallly correct
At 12:16 am. We just got out of the truck and went behind it and fucked. With 3 people in the truck. On the side of the road. As cars drove by.
The stripper told Tom to sort his life out
Jesus I was next level high last night having a mental epiphany about the state of Virginia
my dad just built a flame thrower.. you should probably get here
I can see. My condolences to your vagina.
Reverse road head. Sa-witch!!!
Randomize
