she burped and cried multiple times. it was like i was getting head from a baby.
Dude if I didn't piss myself last night I dont think I would have woke up in time for work.
Now there's vomit covered trash all over the front lawn. I feel accomplished
He's like the houdini of condoms. I never even realized he put one on before we fucked. he's magical.
No that's sign language, not a drinking game. I tried to join
scratched cornea got me an eyepatch and a blowjob from a girl with a thing for pirates
can you go into shock from having too many orgasms? i think i went into shock.
Next test. Underwater blowjob. If you fail...out of water blow job
I'm bringing vagina and cookies. You'll be fine.
I heard liver failure is in for 2012 anyways
Filthy. I need to be power hosed with holy water.
if this uncomfortable exchange we're having is you trying to flirt with me i suggest you stop it before someone gets hurt
Is it socially acceptable to break up with someone over snapchat?
Literally just had a girl put her street name into my phone. Yeah.
There's a man with a stuffed dog and a can of dog food on the L. Should I break it to him?
Best not to. Some people need their delusions.
Randomize
