your room smells of hookers.
And success
Have you ever noticed every guy named Shaant has scene hair and date girls with racoons stripes in theirs
His name should be shouldn't
So is chris hansen cool in person? Or is it just awkward while you wait for the cops?
you know it is a bad morning when you forget to brush your teeth and eat old gas x in your car because its minty...
I didnt realize my nipple ring fell out until he coughed it up.
you're thinking of things to pack this weekend and you think Don King wig?
Hurry there's a dancing lesbian. She's a jumper and has impeccable jazz hands.
it's kinda bad that we're already planning travel arrangements to his funeral
I want to be ashamed of the things we do this weekend
The moral of the story is do not hire me because everything will end up smelling like pickles and I will not sufficiently clean it up.
I want what they have, but in the meantime I have a whole bottle of rum to which I'm quite devoted
Whatever. I just smoked another bowl so I don't care and wow I just noticed how fast my thumb moves when I text. I'm amazing.
did i make more ranch sandwiches last night
you had 4
What guy invites over a booty call, gets all naked and then when the real fun begins and a condom is needed, claims to not have one? And wears socks THE entire time?
yeah that bottle of rum is only the second thing I want that kid to be pulling out of his pants
Randomize
