nothing as in nothinggggg kills the mood for me is when a girl with 4 cm nipple hair
Dude, I just saw a sixteen year old girl in a catholic school uniform buying a pregnancy test... With a coupon!
Sorry for calling you a whore in front of your mom. World cup brings the worst out of me.
False alarm I know hes alive because when i tried shaking him awake he pissed his pants and rolled over..
Vom Wallet is no more. We now boldly enter a responsible, adult era where we will not throw up liquor onto ourselves.
Im calling you paparazzi cause of all the dick pics you take of your one night stands ps loved the panoramic one!
Mostly because I hate my job and a have a photogenic penis.
How was the picnic?
We played softball, except our team sucked. In one hand was a mitt, the other a beer.
Why didn't you put them down?
No beer left behind.
Tip of the day: Don't Amazon vibrators when your WHOLE FAMILY uses your prime account. There's dildo after dildo showing up in my "Related to Items You've Viewed" category on the home page.
stupid neighbors doing stupid yard work with their stupid kids when i want to do drugs in the backyard
Sooo, my mother is snoring, my ex is sexting me, the guy I'm having an affair with is sending me dick pics, and all I want to do is sleep!
Ya know. I was thinking of my slutty moments the other day and finally know which one makes the number 1 spot.
My purse is full of condoms and money.
I like where this is going...
Mid thrust, say hold on I need a pic for my friend.
Can you dump a guy for having pierced nipples or is that shallow?
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