my orientation roommate looks just like New York of Flavor Flav fame
Can't remember why I called but it definitely had something to do with Lou Bega
Thanks for the birthday present, i had so much fun playing with it
Are you talking about my vagina?
can you imagine how much money lesbians save on birth control?!?
bitches.
He literally is quoting that 21 questions song, the 50 cent one. oh my god.
Strip beer pong in the front yard? Of course the cops showed up
She looks like she smells of sausage, sunblock and sorrow.
He is sitting on the foor in the soup aisle saying "to each their own soup"
I kinda feel like I was hit by a Prius. Just glad it's not bus status.
AND WHAT FELONIES DID I MISS OUT ON WHILE SLUMBERING!?
He called me at 4am to ask me to marry him, then threw up into the phone for 10 minutes.
I don't need to know how horny your mother is, hun.
are you putting in a lot of effort today like appearance wise
I am taking my rightful place as emperor of the undead appearance wise
Successfully defrauded the county government. What have you done today?
you said, "I wonder what your mum is doing right now." in the middle of sex, of course I threw up on you.
Randomize
