Mel Gibson is dating a 24 year old
You're not Mel Gibson and I'm not 24.
This is the worst date ever. Pls kill me. No, wait, scratch that, stick to the original plan of killing Paris Hilton, I'll live though this
He's getting better. i'm using GuitarHero to teach him how to finger me. My clit = the red tab.
Facebook stalking a girl from Germany is harder then you think.you have to copy and paste all this shit into freetranslations.com then try and piece together an awkward sentence. If only I could put this energy into something productive.
I hope you realize, I'm counting on you as my wingman next semester. It's your turn to advertise another man's penis. I did my tour all freshman year.
Where are you? I hear fireworks and you've gone missing. I'm sure that is not coincidence.
So I thought the party was crazy before his pinky came off...
At some point, it turned less into sparring and more into tough guy dry humping.
All I know is that I woke up in a soccer players' dorm, and he said that I kept telling him my mouth was a "net for his balls" last night at the bar..
My concierge just asked me to his place for dinner while I was signing for a delivery. The delivery was a box of vibrators. Let's discuss.
woke up to a case of keystone on my porch when I went to bed at seven that morning.. I think it's someone's peace offering for getting my roommates car towed
His baby mama found the pictures of us, she couldn't see my face but she could see my asshole. So I'm safe.
Between his smile and monumental dick even the virgin mary woulda blown that man and I am far from the virgin. I didn't stand a chance.
I just balanced a full glass of chocolate milk on my left boob. Don't think i've ever been more proud.
also. when i get a car, the amount of space there is for sex WILL be a huge deciding factor.
Randomize