this is no time to have dignity 4/20 is coming
Damn it if I pass out in the bathroom one more time this month im going to rehab...
I don't want to talk about her cat for two hours only to dry hump till I'm blistered. Not worth it.
My vagina is depressed thinking about her future.
Let's discuss options later this evening. I'll draw out said options and compare and contrast the "accessibility" of the costume for quickies. Because you never know. Halloween is full of surprises. I'll also compare practicality, level of skank, and creative features.
Well, when he's back from China he's probably gonna be pissed I used the spare key he gave me to prove to everyone I'm fucking an NBA player. We took all his booze too.
He got a slutty, ugly mother of a 7 year old, and I got a dog that only sleeps and shits on clean clothes. No one won in this break up.
Hello. You don't know me, but word on the street is that we are now eskimo sisters. I feel like we should go out for coffee and compare experiences.
I decided it might be a good time to stop when he requested I "bring that pussy over here"
i'm not drunk or reckless enough to have you track my every fucking move. I AM AN ADULT
I THINK it was the lead singer. Whoever he was, I have his number and his dick was pierced.
It was totally the lead singer.
I never thought I would have to arrest my own parents on a sunday night
Please tell me I did not drink enough whiskey to think that having sex with my boyfriend while his best friend was on the floor next to us was a good idea.
5 am booty call not ok. The fact I actually went over definitely not ok. My vag needs to learn some control.
I do not recommend playing football on LSD like at all
Randomize