Well to be completely honest its more of a 'i wanna do things to you that your parents would not enjoy hearing about' mood
Any of you guys fuck a 16 year old again? Because our front yard got fucked over high school style.
He just made his dick say "woof" and howl at me. can you pick me up?
i feel like arbor mist is too classy for that. you need a colt 45
Yeah you're right. The one time when arbor mist is too classy
all you kept saying from the spare room was "can you bring me a puke bowl...and the cat"
so I'm coping with getting the "I'm not over my ex" bomb dropped on me by getting drunk and yelling at people while wearing a purple princess hat
The question is do I invite my fuck buddy to my graduation party now that my girfriend found out about her?
I'm challenging a 70 yr old alcoholic woman who is half my size tonight. Wish me luck
We found you passed out clutching your purse. There was 16oz of unopened cheddar cheese inside. You just kept saying SALSA YES.
I can't tell whether I'm a) still hungover from two nights ago, b) legitimately sick or c) all of the above... multiple choice was never my forte
He picked me up in the very car he devirginized me in, his moms toyota.
You just said the word 'slut' out loud in your sleep and then made a moaning noise
I told her my blood type was O Positive and we started making out. Bio majors are weird.
"hahahaha" is not a sufficient reply when I tell you my mother laughed at a joke about me giving blowjobs.
I duct taped a bottle of vodka to the back of your closet while you were sleeping in case of emergencies. Go rip it off, it's going to be a long night.
Randomize
