I'm kindof freaked out about my cock not getting up this morning. Cove over later so I can sort this out. Do not post this on texts from last night.
Damn that would have been a great one. Hahah and don't worry...
put your party hat on. and by party hat I mean no panties
I thought at least he would want to exchange numbers after he tried to put it in my bum
He made me cum so much, I almost let him spend the night. The operative word being "almost".
It's one of the reasons i'm here, along with emotional support, physical support if you need it, and power orgasms.
i just realized i put more money and effort into 420 then i did for christmas
I'm bringing a flask to the test on friday. If I'm gonna fail at least I can enjoy the experience
Exactly, finding that perfect flask to come with you on all your adventures is like finding the perfect wedding dress. You have to feel it.
I've officially done it all, fucked a girl wearing a twister board. ABC parties are amazing!
jake and the teradactyl broke up, operation get high and find him a new girl who hasn't had sexual experiences with three delts simultaniously is in full effect.
So he's compensating for a really small penis. Either that or he's a drug lord.
I wish my bank account would intervene on my life choices.. $200+ in alcohol in 2 weeks and a $40 McDonald's bill is a cry for help.
I DMed the cop that arrested me to come unlock my keys out if my car today
My school has hired a professional rum bottle juggler for our dining hall this evening.
He nicknamed his dick "the fountain of youth" I think it's time to move on...
Randomize