Let me rephrase. Would it display my intentions too much if i walked all the way across my office and into the bathroom carrying my book
The reason halloween exists is because it's not cheating if you're wearing a costume.
the bouncer kept askin you for id just to see how long it would take you to find your pants
She started to tell me how she goes to a shrink, so I started thinking how to sneak out of her place, then she said part of it was for her sex addiction, long story short she's got her clit peirced n I just got laid
I had 4 margarita's and 2 mixed drinks and i blew zero's. Its a cinco de mayo miracle.
God, you're like boner-b-gone
i think every time you texted me i responded with 'bathroom floor'
can we get together and have a vodka water gun fight? i need to get som intense excersise/alcohol
At one point you starting double fisting oreos in your mouth confused about how you got out of the car
Its really bad when you fall asleep at a stop light outside the hotel and you wake up to a small spanish limo driver knocking on your window to tell you it's a green light
She is crazy, dude. She actually bit me on the gootch.
You woke me up at 2 am to tell me I could pee in a golf club if I wanted to.
I literally walked into the toilet, looked at my reflection, said "alcohol" and went back to bed...
Is it against health code to come into work half drunk and commando?
U were so upset when the shower ruined ur nachos. I didn't kno what to do.
Randomize
