I was taking a piss and started puking. I pissed myself and made a mess in the bathroom. Passed out, then got up and went back out from 11pm to 5am.
I changed 4 diapers and slept horribly in our hot apt. Now, I'm at my inlaws house watching the Rangers get pummeled. Oh how our lives differ.
just spent all of my last class as a college student, vomiting in the bathroom. its moments like these i will cherish
...She just said, "We've been blessed with good drugs lately."
once you started introducing yourself as "running-bear" i knew you were beyond fucked up
There's a warrant out for his arrest for throwing a mannequin through a bus stop.
Its like a zucchini between his legs. An orgasmic zucchini.
Jello bowls to the fucking face, that or ramen spiked with liq. Those are the only options in this house.
I'm pretty sure the bus driver knew how hung over I was and hit all the pot holes on purpose. I threw up into my water bottle.
Thank you <3 he just looked at me, fist bumped me, and asked me what was on my titty....we may cut her off
So lets not base feelings on vagina tingles
How do you clean human pee out of a carpet
Inconspicuously
I will go to bed dreaming of sexy Olympians carting me on a throne to the beach where they feed me pizza and champaign and massage my head/wash it like the hair dresser does.
It's 7am. I'm sitting on the curb in last nights clothes with a nose bleed and no idea how to get home. Low moment I feel.
I've come to the conclusion that my issue is I'm not fucking a guy with a headboard
she has no right to get mad at us for drinking during the wedding. she's the one that chose the bridesmaid dresses with pockets.
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