guy in front of me on the bus did 12 yrs, hes teling me about how to knife fight
I just gift wrapped bread.
I tried to tell her I've only slept with 3 other people...she then named off 5 of her sorority sisters I fucked and asked me if she should continue
It's like if you got one of your titties chopped off...think of how much one would miss the other...that's how I feel when we're apart. A tit with no twin.
All of the sudden your world had become nothing but the sum of visible dicks. Welcome to life.
Two word: claymation porn. Think about it.
I don't think I can ever express my appreciation for the things you text me.
I'm actually not sure I need to run today, between the crazy monkey sex and breaking into my own house.
Its like her house is inhabited by 50 year old lesbian water color artists with a throw pillow fetish
It was less of a bar, and more of an abandoned basement that some people sell booze in.
My vagina is screaming your name . Wtf did you do to it
woke up to a case of keystone on my porch when I went to bed at seven that morning.. I think it's someone's peace offering for getting my roommates car towed
i just googled coccaine effects on sexual performance..maybe im dating the wrong guy
Sex in a tree, bucket list CHECK!
When the nurses wouldn't let him smoke in the hospital he decided to just roll around on the floor.
you were shouting "me peeing on him is the closest he'll EVER get to my vagina!"
Randomize
