So Delta doesn't take cash. I used my card to buy a drink and asked the attendant if she could leave it open.
Hiding in the clothes rack at walmart like a 4 year old. Already scared 3 people. New fav weekend activity
My mom is purposely blasting Shania Twain downstairs so I can't jack off.
There are lots of gay asians. This is better than i was expecting
At least he's enough of a gentleman to not make me do the walk of shame dressed as Santa.
ive cried into many a lonely burritos..
Whatever. I am not explaining the physics of my dick slapping.
Happy 4th. Did you guys get your syphilis thing taken care of?
I was walking back to the dorm and was made fun of for wearing a coat. I'M SORRY I CARE ABOUT MY WELL BEING.
So basically he is jobless, a potential serial killer, and has poor taste in music? We simply don't have time for that.
This is my last chance to be the first person to fall off this roof.
I feel like people expect me to always be a sarcastic, shade throwing drunk. And you know me, I hate to disappoint.
Now swiping left on 23-year-olds with abs. Is this adulting?
The people at Perkins seem so judgemental. Big deal if i'm handcuffed to stripper in a star-n-stripes bikini. We still gotta eat.
seriously i don't trust him. he fed me a hot dog out of a crock pot and gave me moonshine dashed jager bombs.
Randomize
