its easy. just sleep with a bunch of guys until one falls in love
You American Chicks are so confusing....1 day you are on my nuts next day you be trippin
Dude its not just American chicks...a small penis is the same in every language
Why is there a living, breathing cow on your front porch?
every time i get drunk at her place i end up leaving with nothing but an empty box of toaster strudels..
I made Mark strip for me and do a stripper dance. I put 2 dollars in his mouth
Hey..um, you dont know me, but I just found your purse in a bush at the end of my street this morning
Its summer. Time to get to the freshmen before the weight does.
holy shit i just had sex in a phone booth i so feel young again
The name of tonight's festivities is hereby decreed to be the "Honey Boo Boo Hootenanny".
I mean jail does seem alright, all the free broth you can eat.
Hey man, when I left for work she was laying on the couch naked cuddling your keurig, can you clean that mess up?
He fucked me over, so I'm going to do what any rational woman does. I'm going to get really high and have sex with his brother.
I almost stopped mid bj to let him know I appreciated his balls being nice to look at/have my face near. But I didn't know if that would ruin, or improve the moment.
On a scale of 1-10 how inappropriate is it for me to ask if Walgreens offers teacher discounts when purchasing a Plan B pill?
im just letting you know I walked in on you with four different guys last night. a. you were all naked. b. they're all roommates
Randomize
