East Village: Only place you can play pac man while eating a pineapple hotdog, go to the bar next door and see a graphic blowjob on every tv
Unfortunately, they didn't pull of their wake and bake plans. Instead, they waked and vomited like a half-retarded giraffe till everyone woke up.
Tonight's Real World episode reinforced the well-known fact that men of any caliber can hook up with girls named "Crystal"
It could have went better. They kicked us out of the casino and I drunkenly whipped her across the face with a fishing pole. Long story.
she had a concussion and she still scored nine points higher than me on the midterm
Is there a word for someone who only has sex with NFL prospects?
Pre warning. Your not gonna sleep tonight cuz I'm staying with your roommate. Thanks for breaking up with me.
Please tell me why there is some girl tied to our toilet?
doing shots of $6 a bottle whiskey and chasing it with milk. my own personal way of saying fuck life.
Did you find any other hidden treasures in my room? Specifically weed? Or Slim Jims?
Everything smells like blood and olive oil.
We lost you in the mall, but to no surprise we found you waiting in line to sit on santas lap. You said you wanted to ask him for a pound of weed and a subway giftcard for xmas.
We held a candle light vigil outside the jail hoping for her release, until we realized we were drunk in the jail parking lot.
I just told a guy I'm a cross of Kim K, Hilary Clinton and a dragon... He was still into it.
His sex game is strong it’s like a warlord’s dick! you know what I mean?
Nope
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