pshh wine cellars. now if he has a tequila cellar whole different story
you kept lifting my skirt up, yelling "PANTY PARTY". needless to say, you're at the top of my father's shit list right now.
I wonder how many times I can be hungover in one day
I just ditched my friends to hang out with the chilis restaurant crew...one of these girls better have daddy issues
A Bum and I jusst hugged. its not even 8 pm.
Maybe. This hangover is made of nightmares and that thing from the Alien movies.
I just found out that I slept with Kate Gosselin's publicist back in June . Brb I have to wash myself endlessly.
That would make regret #10
He was more like the original regret
Trying to coordinate a drug deal while taking a psych test is not easy.
Just found out I made out with the 40 year old Captain of the boat at the barge party. On the bright side he let me drive the boat so at least there's that.
You FaceTimed your mom in the back of the limo telling her how many guys you hooked up with at the concert
all of these bad things happened because I didn't bring a shower beer.
my liver is dry heaving
I just want an early 40-something dude who is vaguely unencumbered, professionally driven and wants to put me in a ball gag.
so how about you dont randomly call my mother during parties?
Randomize
