he chased her out of the bar yelling "TAKE MY VIRGINITY" and i havent seen her since
I told him that he is like a snow storm I never know when he is coming, how many inches I will get, or how long it will last
new level of vanity: sex dreams about deep throating myself...
i just packed a bowl on a big bird place mat and smoked it in a spaceship with a slide. i love babysitting.
we had incredible sex, then he proposed with the vibrating cock ring
Hey on the reals though tomorrow if i take you out to lunch as just a friend will you also suck my cock as just a friend?
I've never seen a homeless man jog to get off the bus and then run to his panhandling spot because he's "late for work," but you see something new every day.
I made this pact with my vagina, though. No more heartless fuckery.
I woke up and they were watching power rangers in japanese so I just found my bra and left
...I'm not a booty call or a pizza...you can't just call/text and expect to be eating me in an hour..
I'm still getting random messages from guys about my Halloween outfit. Electrical tape is coming back next year
Oh my fucking god that cat looks just like you after you accidentally took Ketamine
Sleeping with him wouldn't be considered hoeing out... It seems more like babysitting.
I just had sex with the Sheriff's Deputy. You should call me.
I think it's your fault my nipples aren't sensitive anymore.
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