Yeah....I really appreciate it....I didn't even get it from hooking up....lame, atleast if a girl gets u sick when u r hooking up it was fun in its inception...
He just asked me if I ever had the urge to put a zucchini in my ass.
I think when she wakes up, she'll either kill me, or laugh. I hope she laughs.
Just read my long term horoscope. I'm not gonna get laid for another 2 years.
Did you get my bra back of the bartender?
I seriously think we need to revision your idea of 'keeping a low profile'
There's a girl in the bathroom crying about something having to do with cream cheese.
Walked into my campus store carrying a pitcher of sangria. No fucks given. Also this recipe is banging.
I'm imaging you naked, covered in butter. And I gotta say, I'm not impressed.
jake and the teradactyl broke up, operation get high and find him a new girl who hasn't had sexual experiences with three delts simultaniously is in full effect.
yesterday pre dick pic he said "no disrespect to your situation but i cant wait to get ahold of you again in the future" is this how people network??
He wore the same cologne as my orthodontist so all I could think about was how I hadn't worn my retainer in months
He yanked my breathe right strip off in the middle of me riding him.
It will pretty much be equal to the feeling I had when you let me hold your dick while you were peeing, or when I graduated high school!
Banged a guy with 2 broken arms once. Top that
the weird part wasn't waking up in someone else's underwear, it was how the cat was staring at me like he knew more about last night then i remembered.
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