just won 30 on black! Ok adicteddd! Never coming back gqmbeqing is easy.
now my debit card is betting 1k whoops. im gongk eh be rich!!!
whoops didnt work. think the gambeli mashine is busters!! now im betting 2k?! bad idea?
i have your red jacket for some reason. and a good deal of shame and embarasment. note to self, wear underwear when you wear a dress. also, i was electrocuted last night. dont ask how.
there's paper in my vomit.
We need to find a way to make penises more like hookahs.
found her sleeping in the closet. woke her up and she said she was camping.
It's what America was founded on: former hookups referring you for a job four years later.
dude. this chick is staring at me like i gave her brother herpes.
A little light bondage fun never hurt anybody (erotic asphyxiation excluded). Car batteries attached to reproductive organs have.
Imagine getting a FB inbox "hey I found your ID on the floor of a bar can you send me a mugshot so I can get a second piece of ID made?"
Next time you see his dad you should let him know you are now Eskimo brothers.
So apparently when I'm drunk and want water I pant like a dog and expect to have water given to me..
do you ever just look around and think about how great it is to have depth perception? Like it's really, really cool when u think about it
On another note; I'm three days away from being 1/12th of my way from not having sex for a year. I need to get laid.
Woke up. Found about 20 condoms upstairs. A hole in the couch. Bread on the floor. Going back to sleep.
This should be illegal
It is
I mean more illegal... I shouldn't have this
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