I'm good, just tired from chardonnay and giving hand jobs.
if another girl says "im usually cleaner down there" I'm just going to shoot myself
The more I hate his personality, the more I love his penis.
This guy just showed us his webbed feet to prove that his son was actually his son
How would one go about tricking someone into chugging an entire bottle of tequila?
Okay, just a casual question: how did i manage to get grass stains on the inside of my bra?
I got called a drunken housewife today in class. I'm proud, not many people can say they've achieved their life goals like I have by the time they turn 20
I had sex for the second time today and ate an entire bag of alligator jerky on the way home. These truly are the golden years.
i'm face down in a ditch right now please help this is not a metaphor for my life this is real.
i feel like i am made of mashed potatoes. i love cannabis pills so. fucking. much.
Ive been high since the plane left the ground in Los Angeles and Ive been in Chicago. Right now, Im on a train headed towards downtown to go to an anime convention. At this point, I am just taking life as it comes, furries and all.
She was here for a threesome... She doesn't have to put the new roll of toilet paper on the dispenser. She can leave the new roll wherever she wants!
Idk I saw a cheetah print onesie and it reminded me of your Lion King fantasy.
we are the best best friends ever. You had sex in an ice cream truck I had sex in a fire truck
You really do take on your dog's personality she sounded like her pug breathing when we were going at it.
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