he chased her out of the bar yelling "TAKE MY VIRGINITY" and i havent seen her since
Grown men dancing to Spice Girls and a girl wearing one shoe. I belong here
They both told everyone they fell in a mud puddle
Oh they definetly fell in the mud, repeatedly, on top of each other
i was actually impressed that she managed to throw up underwater while scuba diving
Circumcision scars are like fingerprints. I think I'm on to something man.
I brought some guy back to have cheese whiz with me. Then sent him home
Was he satisfied?
No, and very vocal about it.
The orgasm outlasted the Charlie horse. Pros and cons.
but I'll probably watch some porn later so it's not a complete waste of a Saturday night.
Lets get real here, ive seen your moms breasts multiple times
I'd say you were a shitshow. Playing floating beer pong in the pool you kept filling other people's cups with pool water and laughing to yourself.
I woke up at 4 am. Literally pissed. No idea what happened. I could have fucked a cow.
I think when Jesus turned water into wine it was a sign that we should get drunk off Sangria tonight. Do it for Jesus. He died for your sins.
This town is a penis wasteland. I haven't seen a suitable penis in months. This is becoming an emergency situation. I need penis in my life
By the end of our first date my penis was pierced.
We had sex then laid in his bed eating chocolate and drinking juice boxes. I think I'm going to keep him around.
Randomize
