i just googled "what is oprah really like?" how do YOU think my night is going?
I didn't realize how hung over I was until I rolled over and the world rolled over with me.
He told me his penis would be a "Sad Panda" if I didn't give it a ride through the jungle.
Her bed is on wheels, so we woke up in the kitchen.
NEVER LET ME DO THIS AGAIN I FEEL LIKE I'M GONNA SHIT MYSELF TO DEATH ARGHHHHHGHHG IS THIS WHAT DYSENTERY FEELS LIKE
It's all coming back to me. I drank moonshine from a milk carton from a guy named tomohawk last night.
I dnt think she needs convincing on the threesome part, it's the threesome with your roommate situation that needs some work
I'm more of a 'talk at me while I stare at you' kinda girl.
You crowd surfed from beer pong into the bathroom where you spent the rest of the night, also I have your wallet
Well I guess I'll go shower now and wash all the stripper off.
One of those days. Also, your pants are now in my protective custody.
You must be buzzed on Miller Lite.. Zen master advice is flowing
:(. i have vodka in a fire extinguisher. that solves all problems. except fires. it would actually make that worse.
If ur gunna go fuck a guy that's in the baseball hall of fame do you need to shave your legs? I'm so lazy
There might be a dead possum in your bed, your roomate is extremely distressed!
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