my grandmother thought she vaccuumed up a quarter so she made me open the bag, dump it out on her front lawn, and dig through it. no quarter.
so I think I'm done having sex with her, she's way too crazy
what about the blowjobs for adderall?
no those are still okay
Let me guess--your parents are cousins.
She dropped a weight class after every shot I took. I thought I was just drink something magical.
you said you wanted to feel how much my penis weighed for educational purposes
I decided that Calgary can keep my underwear. They earned it.
Just made a Xanax and ginger ale smoothie. Oh Thursday you are good to me..
Vom Wallet is no more. We now boldly enter a responsible, adult era where we will not throw up liquor onto ourselves.
C'mon pople!!! THursday afternoon isnot gonna drinkin itself!!!
Update: I may or may not be in a cult
Update #2: I may or may not be the leader of said cult
I still have your make up all over the inside of my thighs from the face sitting. Free tonight?
That is was cool to fuck the single mother accross the street until every girl i bring home gets the car keyed.
I don't need to know how horny your mother is, hun.
Killing two birds with one stone tonight: mastrabation meditation. Win win.
I just trimmed my bush to manageable levels. I'm gonna take a nap and then get in there and finish the job.
Randomize
