were you the shorter or taller girl out of you two
UPDATE: In a passionate fit of self love, I brought myself to orgasm under the moon on my 7th floor balcony, ejaculating between the rungs towards the ground.
Unfortunately, I did not realize that most of it would end up on the balcony below mine.
At least you don't cum in color.
proudest moment: just made a guy walk into a parked car with his mouth hanging open cause of the shirt im wearing.
Just cleaned up my puke with my lecture notes.
Um, I don't really remember much about the event... and then I woke up on the metro..
My face is bruised from laying on the concrete. NO MORE VODKA!
This kid is too lonely to be my drug dealer.
Used a cardboard box as a pillow and a towel as a blanket. Its like the great depression over here
I LOVE YOU SO MUCH I'M ON A WILD DICK CHASE FOR YOU. How many lesbians do YOU know that would do that? HOW MANY????
My tub is filled with twinkies which would be awesome if they were still wrapped and not floating in a mixture of bath water and what appears to be vomit.
just ran into my drill sergeant from basic 4 years ago. gonna take him home and have him fuck me at the cadence of quick time.
You literally just told me you're ditching me because of pizza. PIZZA? Wow.
Are you seriously getting this frustrated over a hand-job right now?
I was on top for a full on make out when in dead silence "I'm moaning Myrtle" came from the TV. Moment ruined. I got cock blocked by a fictional ghost
My orgasm happened in two different decades
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