Omg. It looks like a crack pipe exploded in your mouth.
rubbing her clit was like playing thumb war
when you get a chance can you look up 'free abortion clinic' for me? cuz i dont think i'll be lucky enough for a second miscarriage.
You are the patron saint of my drinking problem.
I think she's a little more wasted than usual. She just crawled on the floor to tell mom it was time to take a shot.
He fucked volume into my hair. It was amazing.
apparently they wrote a song entitled "butt slut" about her... im thinking shes not girlfriend material.
You opened a bottle of wine with a shoe and a wall last night.
theres a new barista at starbuck holy fuck she's hot
i want to face-plant into her vagina
HELP A SISTER OUT. AND KEEP YOUR TONGUE OUT OF THE HUMMUS.
TOO HIGH TO FIGURE THIS SHIT OUT
She was drunk and naked on our couch, sweating and masterbating to SNL. We made eye contact and she didn't even stop. It's new-roommate-o-clock
I fell asleep after the worst sex of my life and now I'm snowed in with him. SEND HELP. CALL FEMA. GET ME OUT OF HERE.
Why is there soup literally in every orifice of my body?
I had sex in the back of a hot foreign guy with a lacoste eye patch's car
Apparently I had 2 bloody noses and after my sis put me to bed at the hotel, I escaped and my sister's friend found me in an elevator with some guy
Randomize
