A little girl and i are having a face making battle in mcdonalds
She started it, but I totally finished it.
have you facebook stalked him yet?
No, I don’t know his last name...
Just google his license plate numb
I swear I could audibly hear her vagina slam shut when you walked up to hit on her.
Did I at antime last saturday slip away and sign up for a prayer circle?
Sorry I never showed up last night. It was between spending time with you and our freinds or having violent multiple orgasims. I chose the low road.
Why do I have a missed call from "The Anaconda" ?
So when this rash is gone wanna hang out?
I just put on my phone calendar to remind me of my final child support payment in 2029
We may not see eye-to-eye on much, but I'm definitely willing to let you see eye-to-vagina again.
You have better ratings than Crest. Only 4/5 dentists recommend it. You have 8/9 recommendation for your blowjob skills.
I was just thinking about all the dick I could catch while I am home. But then I realized I am too lazy to get out of my pjs and leave my cat.
Don't take a pillow from my bed. You don't know which ones of them my vagina has been on
I feel like I smell like bad decisions
I’m going to have to rewatch all of them. Drugs, man.
Will exercising make me less horny?
Randomize
