i don't mind that he's uncut. i like it! it's like a little sweater!
a cock doensn't need a sweater! especially a skin sweater! wtf.
That's like some buffalo bill hannibal lector shit.
I heard you threw up in your lap?
I heard that too.
i stapled my math hw together with an ear ring, too ghetto?
on the way to work, i saw an empty wine bottle sitting in the middle of an intersection. i thought of you.
i can respect that.
Attn: you have now used your free, one time admission to pleasure town. Thank you for visiting I hope you enjoyed your trip. All future trips to P.T. Will cost you full admission price. We have different pricing plans to accommodate different situations, and remember it is more of a bartering system than a set price. Your patronage is always welcomed and once again thank you for visiting and have a fantastic evening.
I'm lying topless with an eye infection at the foot of my bed with a dog between my legs. With disney in the background. Its one of those 3 am moments
I think the closest to heaven you can get in this world is your morning dump after a night of Molly
I just spent an hour in the shower pretending I was a member of the b-52's. I can't go to work like this
I decided not to look up the nudes, because I believe that there is a line, and that mocking my old classmate's horrid nudes alone crosses that line.
I think i'm the first person to get kicked out of a club while completely sober. Come outside please!!
I keep having dreams where I tie him up and eat cookies off of him while riding him. Wtf brain.
WHY IS SHE PANDERING YOU, A SIMPLE GOBLIN, TINY WEENER PICTURES OVER STATE LINES
Looks like a sea otter shaved my vagina. Keep an eye out for me this weekend, no one can see this.
My life is over, I got a mugshot while wearing a shirt that said 'milf hunter'.
He brought me a bottle of Jack, got me off 3 times, & then left. This is the best fakelationship ever!
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