Note to self: soco dudes get amusinly uncomfotable when I moan at the urinal.
Now that the fun of having an iPhone has worn off I find that using screen as a coke tray is by far my favorite app
even iPhones love lady gaga. everytime I type haha it trys to correct it to gaga. this is bullshit...
all ill say about last night is that we tried to stop you. oh and the bus you're on is going to nashville.
i'm pretty sure the only people calling it "sexting" are ones who don't actually do it
Good, she had spurs on her boots. That is a sign for instant herp attack.
Sex tent. say it aloud its amazing. promise you we rnt stoned.
I woke up to him drunk-t-bagging me, saying "huevos rancheros" were being served for breakfast.
underwater hpnotiq shots? sure why not.
You insisted on calling your mixture of Bacardi & powdered milk "a Jamacian Facial."
Dude you were sitting on a bench on the street with her for 45 minutes thinking you were on the bus
Would you consider masturbating to Hocus Pocus an adulthood high or low?
Stupid adulating
Yeah it sucks, but at least I can buy wine so it all comes out in the wash
Unless your name is actually "Ticfj" like my phone says, I have no idea who you are...
I peed in my closet, which at the time looked like a sparkly bathroom...
Randomize