Braces and a neon one piece. She looks 15.
i'm in love
at a bar and heard one girl tell another her tampon string was showing she goes i dont want it in anymore anyways. then proceeds to pull out her tampon in the middle of the bar and leave it on a plate. ewwww
Need a ride. Apparently screaming about the bartender's erectile dysfunction gets you kicked out.
You can't use the, "think about your future" line when trying to convince me to save some weed for tomorrow.
Any idea who the guy in my bed tagged as rattlesnake dick might be?
Sorry my moustache came off because I was face first in a layered bucket full of jello shots.
I just sent you a google doc listing all the reasons why I should stop hooking up with him. Feel free to add to it.
Hahahahahahhajahahahahajajjajahjahahajahahajajahahahajjajajahahjajajajajahahahajjjajajaahhahhahahahahahahahaha dominos taxi
Do I need to take a photo of my sister's enlarged and disgustingly dark nipples to scare you into protection? DO I?
I can't figure out if I'm dying from all of the booze still in my system, or from the cement wall.
Also the McRib is back. Lets get high, dress like cowboys, and eat some McRibs.
sorry like um she made me hold her puke bag while she peed in front of me is that better
When you finally get laid, I shall make you a trophy out of dildos
I just had some kinky fun in the back seat of my car behind a Ralph's in south county. How's your thanksgiving eve?
So what happened at girls night? My roomate found me passed out locked out on the front steps of the house and it was raining. Yes low moment
Randomize
