What the hell am I supposed to do with 50 gallons of mayo?
i watch way too much csi for them to even pretend to be my friend.
We video chatted for almost two hours. But I woke up with puke on my keyboard. The question of the day: were we still chatting when I vommed? No idea.
i was drunk and our names rhymed...what was i supposed to do?
He asked me out while I'm back in town. I have to acknowledge and honor his persistence.
Your vagina must be laced with cocaine...
My penis just literally said "Yaaaaaay!!!" It's the first time it's spoken out loud. Before this we could only communicate through rudimentary sign language
This hangover is so bad, we are pregaming Chinese food with pizza.
on a brighter note, the cop thought i could kick adams ass if it came down to that and said he had $20 on me if it ever happens
Do you remember trying to make pizzas with the domino workers last night...while trying to speak their language with them.. spanish?
Last night all you did was whine about how you needed something new and exciting
Is THAT why I woke up with dreadlocks?
Sorry you felt insulted last night let me rub your butt in remorse
Let's just say it was like a porno version of Aladdin....
Apparently I have decided there are no repercussions for my actions
Already doing pt exercises by picking my margarita up off the night stand. Fuck yeah.
Pretty sure this radio station is run by a cult. Good thing it's in Spanish, can't brainwash someone who can't understand you.
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