do you remember how we all fit in that bathtub?
tequila
If it makes you feel better, you're better at taking it in than ass than she is...
Well...yeah actually, that does make me feel better
Just smoked a bowl with the exterminator. I think my day is more productive.
I think hes settled down now. He's just licking the walls and the windows.
Hangovers were designed by God when he decided that so far he had taken it WAY TOO EASY on me.
Yeah. I had to take off my shirt. It's soaked in weakness.
Oh my god. You have got to get off that breast feeding support group. They're on to you, dude.
Doing the walk of shame and bringing my dad a newspaper en route. Favourite daughter status confirmed.
Ok well hopefully you're not staging an intervention for me at your place because I'm bringing beers
Well it's official, last night I hooked up with the third girl from the apartment downstairs.
Dude that's a hat trick!
I know, I tossed my hat on the floor as I was walking out.
I'm staying at his house to solve the homeless situation. There's a freezer bag of weed in the fridge. He doesn't know it's there, and he's not missing it so I may have an income soon.
Never thought having a box of Cheerios could get me laid. My new lucky charm hello girl in 2B
Yeah I know my dick is weird, but I've surprisingly had a lot of fun with it.
And god said thou shalt never deny free booze. And it was good.
We peed on a building I think...like a building in downtown...not out of view of anyone.
Randomize
